Based in Los Angeles, The Money Smiths is a blog comprised of thoughts related to personal finances, real estate investing, and musings on early retirement.

Why it's Important to have Someone to Talk to About Money

Why it's Important to have Someone to Talk to About Money

A little about me:

I'm a goal oriented person.  I like to always have a plan for what my next month looks like, my next year, and even the next couple of years.  I also have an exit strategy for just about every aspect of my life.  If you're reading this, you probably know from my previous posts that I like to invest in real estate.  I like watching my net worth move every month, sometimes I find myself doing something completely innocuous on my computer, but I'll still have my net worth worksheet up on the other screen.  I can understand that my infatuation with money can be annoying, or even stressful, to some people.

I'm also an extrovert.  I like interact with others, and I love to have genuine conversations with those people because it grants me the opportunity to form a strong bond with them.  I can talk about the things that I did today, or plan to do in my life, or what I've learned and share how not to make the same mistakes that I have for a very long time.  I also like to listen and understand what people think about what I do, as well as what their goals and aspirations are.

Having the personality that I do has led me to create some very strong relationships over the years, and from those relationships I've learned that having someone to talk to is what has helped me to get to where I am today.  I can't write to you from a place of crazy success or luxury, and I can't write to you as a subject matter expert on any specific topic, but I can share my thoughts and reasoning for just about anything.

I'm lucky enough to not be in this game of life alone, I have Mrs Money Smith to speak to about my goals every day.  She's a fantastic listener, and she also challenges me when I make statements that don't make sense.  She's the person to tell me to slow down when I'm jumping the gun with a decision, she's also the one to force reasoning to my thoughts - even though I share them constantly.  What I've realized from this relationship is that having someone to actually talk to and understand you on more than a surface level is a powerful tool for personal development.

The fact that we talk every day about what we want our lives to be helps to keep me on track toward those goals, it helps to remind me of why I do what I do, and it benefits me greatly to have the opportunity to reiterate my ideas as I say them again and again.  I know that if I didn't have someone to speak with about what drives me, I wouldn't be nearly as far in life as I am at this point.

This is the main purpose of my post today, I want to encourage you to make an effort to find someone that you can really connect with.  I have had many conversations about what I want to be when I grow up with many different people, and unfortunately it took me a long time to find someone who truly listens and can ask the right questions to make you think harder about the who, what, where, why, and how.

The person that you speak to doesn't have to be your significant other.

They could be a friend from school, or someone you know from work.  I'll be the first to admit, even though Mrs Money Smith is always willing to have a conversation with me about money, sometimes it gets old - even for her.  That's why I have a few close friends that are my fall back conversationalists.  When I realize that I need to bounce my thoughts off other people, I turn to those select few that know what I do and how I live my life, and also share a passion for growth and opportunity.

Surround yourself with people better than you.

I honestly believe that each person that I can talk to about my life is much more capable than me in at least one aspect of theirs.  I have a friend who is far more successful than me professionally, he's someone that I can go to for advice on any of life's situations.  I have another friend who is the handiest person I know, I can go to him for any questions or thoughts on anything physically related to my life, from fixing a property, to what I should do when maintaining my car.  A third friend of mine encourages me to take a step back from always trying to grind to a better point in life and to appreciate the position I'm currently in.  He helps me think about travel, or about relaxation, or to just dig deeper into who I am as a person.

Having someone that you can go to for each aspect of your life that's important to you is key.  I would be very impressed if someone was to capable enough to get themselves far in life without anyone to speak to, but I know that I am certainly not that type of person.  Some people have their parents, some have their spouses, some have their friends, and some have random acquaintances from past encounters or even on the internet.

How can you find someone to talk to?

It's actually easier than you might think.  In today's day of technology the world is more connected than it's ever been.  You no longer need to be physically close to someone to form a deep bond and have the opportunity to connect in a standard cadence.  Most of the people that I speak to live on the other side of the country, around 3,000 miles away.  There are many different tools that you can use to connect with others online.  I've personally used websites like Meetup, LinkedIn, and Facebook to find groups of people that share the same interests.  There's probably a group of like-minded folks that hang out just around the corner from you at a recurring cadence that you would fit right in with!  You just have to work up the courage to walk into a room and introduce yourself to someone you don't know.  You might even get lucky and show up to an event and have someone else introduce themselves, so that you don't have to!

Finding friends is great Mr money smith, but why should I talk to people about money?

At the end of the day, talking to people about money will help provide your thoughts with their perspectives.  If you were to tell me, right now, that you were thinking of buying a  brand new car, for instance, I would share my perspective on why you should buy a used one instead.  That chance to either defend your thoughts on why you need to have a new car vs a used one will grant you the opportunity to dig deeper into why you feel that way, or maybe see flaws in your thought process that you didn't see before, unlocking a different outcome. 

Talking about money specifically allows for the same process, but at a micro level.  Sharing your goals with others is a powerful tool that will allow you to really understand who you are as a human, and discover what money actually means to you.  You might come out of a conversation and realize that what you thought was important to you isn't so.  You could also come out of a conversation and understand your root thoughts even more, and double down on your approach.  You can never truly understand the heart of your thoughts until you socialize them with others.  Saying something out loud, or typing it in a chat box, has a wild effect on the validity of it in your mind.

my challenge to you

I want to challenge you to think about who your friends are, and more importantly, which of those friends you can actually talk to.  I would suggest finding someone that you can be as open with in person, as I am on this website.  Someone that you would feel comfortable sharing your net worth with, and someone who would take that information and help you think about what your next moves are in life.

Find someone who you can talk to about money.  Share your goals with them, and more importantly - share why those are your goals.  Also make sure to attempt to understand their goals as well, don't make this conversation one-sided!  You might be surprised what you find out about yourself, or even the other person.

Go Read a Book

Go Read a Book

Net Worth Update #2: August 2018

Net Worth Update #2: August 2018